I believe that one of the biggest obstacles for yoga teachers is the fear of not being appreciated by others, of becoming attached to their students and the results of their actions. Finding a balance between creating a nurturing environment for students and allowing them to grow and face their own limitations can be very difficult. It is important to recognize that as teachers we are also influenced by our own tendencies and desires, such as the need to be liked and admired.
Effective teaching requires that we move beyond seeking validation and instead focus on guiding our students toward self-discovery, helping them recognize their ineffective habits, and fostering self-awareness. Sometimes this involves providing support and encouragement to help them realize their inner potential and achieve things they thought were impossible. We can offer them resources, techniques and knowledge to help them. Other times, it may require us to challenge them by acting as a mirror, confronting their ineffective habits, encouraging them to confront their limitations and avoidances.
Confrontation can manifest in various forms, especially when it involves behavior that goes against shala etiquette and disrupts harmony among fellow practitioners. Examples include consistently arriving late for tutorial classes, neglecting to clean up after yourself, ignoring the silence in the practice room, repeatedly failing to register or paying late for classes, and leaving personal belongings behind. mess around the carpet or in the locker room. Other reasons for confrontation can come from a lack of consistency, repeated registrations for classes and no-shows, too ambitious a physical practice which risks injury, a lack of enthusiasm or interest in following the instructions given, or simply non-compliance with the teacher’s advice. Although some teachers may tolerate these behaviors to retain clients or avoid potential conflicts, it is important to recognize that such behaviors exhibited in a yoga class or on the mat often reflect similar patterns off the mat, thereby contributing to difficulties in other areas of the practitioners’ lives.
Being firm and assertive in your words is not the same as being aggressive. Confrontation does not mean using disrespectful words, belittling or humiliating a student.
If our boundaries and how we choose to share yoga teachings bother or offend a student, it is essential for a yoga teacher to recognize that they cannot be “everyone’s cup of tea”, and that not all students will resonate with their teaching style or values. It is important to remember that students have many other teachers and schools to choose from, allowing them to find the one that best suits their needs and preferences.
It is important for a good teacher to embrace confrontation rather than shy away from it, even if that means facing a student’s anger or disappointment, or the possibility that they will leave. The fear of losing a student due to confrontation stems from attachment and fear of rejection. When a teacher is at peace with this possibility, he can carry out his work with sincerity and transparency. Those who are truly committed to their personal growth will remain dedicated and continue their practice.
If a teacher has been teaching for a while without a few former students talking negatively about him or her, it may be helpful to think about his or her teaching methods. It is important to be aware of any selfish needs we may project onto our students and work to minimize them. Teaching should not be motivated by the desire to be liked, admired, or needed, but rather by creating an environment in which students have the opportunity to gain clarity and understanding of themselves.
Teaching is a journey of continuous learning and self-reflection. By focusing on creating space for growth and self-discovery, a teacher allows their students to see themselves with great clarity, even if it means facing uncomfortable truths. Teachers must embrace the challenges that come with teaching, knowing that those who truly seek a profound path of growth will remain engaged and grateful for their guidance.